It turns out we need to renovate our apartment. While we’ve known for a while that our living space was due for an update, it wasn’t until our 10-year-old daughter started asking for her own room that we realized we couldn’t put it off any longer. With her older sister already occupying one of the bedrooms and me using another as a home office, we simply don’t have the space to give her the privacy she needs. The original plan of the apartment was supposed to accommodate all of us nicely without renovation, but the pandemic, alongside me starting Infinify, has changed our needs, as I now need a home office more than ever before. As much as we’d like to avoid the disruption and expense of a renovation, we’ve come to the conclusion that it’s necessary if we want to maintain our sanity and keep our family happy.

So we know (sigh) that we need to do it. We contacted our architect and started discussing potential plans. We even got to a final one that seems to be the right choice. However, now that we need to actually begin, we are having second thoughts about timing. The architect had asked us whether to move on to the next phase of planning, and we literally didn’t know what to answer for a few days. With everything else going on in our lives, we’re not sure if we have the bandwidth to take on a major renovation project right now.

It’s not just the physical act of renovating that’s giving us pause, but the mental load of managing it alongside everything else we have going on. With three kids and a company to run, we’re already juggling so many balls. We are already running some other big family projects right now. And if we renovate, we want to make sure it’s done right – not just functional, but also beautiful. This means paying attention to every detail, from the color of the walls to the type of light fixtures we choose. The thought of adding this level of complexity to our already busy lives is overwhelming. The thought of all the dust and disruption doesn’t help either.

Mental load is a real thing, and it can have a significant impact on our daily lives. When we are juggling too many tasks and responsibilities, it can lead to increased stress levels, decreased productivity, and even physical health issues. As parents, we want to be present and engaged in our children’s lives, and that can be challenging when we are consumed by the mental load of managing a renovation project.

But the mental load is not limited to personal life, it can also affect companies. It can manifest as decision fatigue, burnout, and decreased productivity. When leaders are overwhelmed with mental load, they may struggle to make strategic decisions and prioritize tasks. This can have a ripple effect on the entire team and the success of the company.

The mental load in a company is often created by trying to bite on more than you can chew. CEOs are always pushing to reach goals quickly, and always come up with new ways to get there. Now, don’t get me wrong – it’s true we all need to move fast, now more than ever. However, there’s a delicate balance between ambitious objectives and unrealistic expectations, or between a hardworking team that works productively against a clear strategy and an overextended team that can’t make a significant impact.

It’s not that we don’t want to work hard, it’s that working hard on too many things comes with the risk of not making any impact whatsoever.

Here are a few steps to dealing with the mental load and making sure you manage the team for effective productivity and not just hard work.

Step 1: Acknowledge the Load

Let’s first understand what the mental load looks like in a tech company. In the fast-paced world of high-tech companies, the constant need for innovation and improvement means that software code is never truly “done.” Customer feedback, as well as code maintenance and improvements, are constant tasks, which can take a toll on team members who are already spread thin.

When companies are spread too thin and taking on too many projects at once, it also creates a different kind of mental load. Prioritization becomes a never-ending discussion, leaving little room for flexibility when plans inevitably change. It means that you deal more with the conflicts between all the projects and not with the projects themselves. 

But perhaps the most meaningful cause for mental load though is the management toll for each project. Not the meetings on your calendar. Not the status updates you send. I’m talking about the time you spend thinking about it when you are not at work. When you walk the dog or while you are driving, for example. These times when your mind wonders are extremely important if you want your projects to be successful and impactful and not just “done”. It’s these times that make the difference between output and outcome. But as I once heard someone say – there are only so many things you can think about in the shower. And that’s the most transparent kind of mental load, but also the most critical one if you want to see your efforts leading to results.

To help the CEO understand this, you need to explain in detail, with relevant examples, why it’s not possible to do everything at once. However, it’s important to avoid framing the discussion in terms of resources, as this can lead to the CEO dismissing effort estimations and insisting that everything is still doable. Instead, the focus should be on the mental load that comes with taking on too much, and how it impacts the overall success of the company, not just timely delivery. It’s important to consider the impact on all departments, from marketing and sales to customer success, and explain how they too are affected by the burden of trying to do everything at once.

Here are two key points for your success when discussing with the CEO: first, identify if you disagree with the overall direction the CEO is taking or with the timeline for implementing it. If it’s the former, strategic discussions are necessary, which I won’t address here directly. But if it’s the latter, don’t make it a discussion about whether or not to do it. Instead, focus on when to do it and whether the team can pull it off.

Secondly, it’s important to be on the CEO’s side. If you want to convince them to change their mind, you need to work with them to understand the details of what they want to accomplish. The only way to change their mind is if they understand for themselves that it’s not doable. If you approach the conversation as an opponent, they will likely become defensive and continue to believe that their goals are achievable.

Step 2: Make Hard Decisions

Once the CEO understands that not everything can be done at once, it’s time to make some tough decisions. As a product leader, it’s important to approach this process with empathy and understanding. You need to recognize that these decisions are truly hard and can be emotionally taxing, both for you and for the CEO. By sharing your insights and concerns with the CEO, you demonstrate your commitment to their success and reinforce your role as a trusted advisor.

When it comes to prioritizing, your role as a product leader is not just to distinguish between important and unimportant tasks. That’s something anyone can do, even Chat GPT 😉 . Instead, your job is to prioritize between multiple important initiatives that cannot all be tackled simultaneously. This is where the real challenge lies. It requires a deeper understanding of the company’s goals and strategy, and a willingness to make difficult decisions that may impact the business in the short term but lead to greater success in the long term. It’s a challenging task, but that’s why you are here.

To succeed, start by thinking about what is most important for your company out of everything that is on the table. This may involve having deeper strategic conversations about your goals if they are not yet clear. Once your goals are clear, pick the top priority and remove it from the list. Then ask yourself: if we succeed at that top priority, what else is needed in order for the company to be successful? Then choose the next priority and so on and so forth until you have your top priorities in order. If you feel you have taken too much, prioritize further. Eventually, look at the list to make sure the things that remain there are things you can live without, or manage the risk of living without them. 

This method can help create clarity around priorities and highlight areas that require creative solutions. For example, you may realize that in order to succeed at a certain front, you only need to keep the lights on and don’t need further development. By approaching the decision-making process in this way, you can avoid spreading your resources too thin and ensure that you are making the most impactful decisions for your company.

Step 3: Allocate Resources Strategically Based on Your Priorities

When you set your priorities right at the strategic level, it’s easier to allocate resources accordingly. For example, one of your initiatives might be to support an existing product and even increase its customer base. When you realize if you had to choose, retention is more important than growth, it might make sense to create a single team who owns both goals and constantly monitors churn to balance between adding new customers and retaining existing ones. This way, you have created a group that has a clear focus tied directly to your goals and not just to specific features. The tradeoffs are built into the team’s work itself, freeing up the rest of engineering to work on developing that new product you want to focus on.

When you do your planning, it’s important to remember that product initiatives don’t exist in a vacuum. It’s not just about engineering – other functions such as marketing, sales, and customer success also need to be aligned with these initiatives to ensure they can effectively support them. Make sure to allocate proper resources from these teams as well to create a cross-functional effort that is focused on delivering the best outcomes for the business, and not just output.

The mental load in companies is often overlooked, especially with higher executives. Start acknowledging and managing it sooner rather than later, to help your company succeed and not just work hard.